Saturday, March 8, 2008

is anybody home?

Hellos my lovelies. Happy New Year to all of you. It's been a while, since I visited here. In these one and a half months since my last post:
- I've moved from an apartment to a home of my own.
- My daughter's going to a new daycare, and she hates it. I'm stressing over how her stressedness is affecting me.
- A [url=http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10349294/]child was clubbed to a coma with a baseball bat[/url] and people were debating her mode of death. It's perhaps only my mommy radar homing in more on these types of stories, but some days I feel like I can't bear it any more. I don't know what I can do that will help in anyway. In the big scheme of things, do our individual narratives matter?
- The 1 year anniversary of the tsunami happened, pushing me anew into a morass of guilt and helplessness
- I developed an apathy to my work. I don't want to work anymore than is absolutely necessary. I'm back to dreaming up stories, but too scared to tell myself to either get it done, or leave it to people with more talent in their grimy toenails than I will ever acquire in my lifetime.
- I became an expert Brickbreaker player :)
- I clung to my weight, despite the sugary holiday temptations that continue to make their way to my desk.
- Ate some kind of seafood, thinking it was artichokes. Surprisingly enough I liked it. I don't know, maybe I'll turn into a carnivore yet.
- Drank responsibly on New Year's, and it felt good.
- Looked up Bangalore White Pages online, and called an old friend at 6:00 am her time. I'm now sitting around wishing I hadn't called in the first place, because she hasn't responded to those four emails I sent.
- Have been lurking @ [url=www.apartmenttherapy.com]Apartment Therapy.com[/url]. And here of course :)

This year, I want to:
- Write something and get it published - a story, a non fiction piece, a poem, a kid's story. Something, anything. Anything to see my name in print.
- Make more friends. One attempt at conversation with a stranger a week. I'm going to act like those Amway people, look out for segways into conversation with strangers. I've realized that my brooding silences are not really a choice, I don't like being that way.
- Improve my relationship with my dad.
- Be more patient with my husband and daughter.
- Prevent my holier-than-thou ethics from getting in the way of my having a good time. Maybe I'll steal sexy lingerie from a store or something ;)

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